After hearing from Aerith, Archer doesn’t waste time by contacting Cloud by his communicator. He simply uses his Warden items to locate Cloud wherever he might be.
Archer's tracking leads him to the greenhouse. It's not the most unusual place to find Cloud, since sometimes he helps Aerith out there, but right now Aerith's not there.
Archer will find Cloud standing near a few clusters of flowers with a focused look, hand at his chin in thought as he considers them carefully.
Cloud, right? Looks like I'm your warden this time around, name's Husk, dunno if I've actually met you in person before. If you want, come on by the Lounge and I'll get you something and we can talk or some shit.
Or not. It's up to you, honestly, not like I do fuckall much else outside of working.
[Cloud's beginning to think the Admiral is jerking him around on purpose when it comes to wardens. How long is he going to just drift from temp to temp like this?
At least this guy seems fairly chill so far.]
Yeah. I've seen you around at the Lounge, you're the bartender, right?
On my way.
[It doesn't take him long to make his way to the Lounge, where he...knocks on the door, if it isn't already open.]
[Husk's not the type to not leave the door open at this point, the whole difference between inmate and warden is stupid as fuck to him and evidently it seems everyone else agrees as he's yet to hear any arguments about it yet.
And he's seeming pretty chill still at this point, casually cleaning glasses while it seems quiet in there, though there's a partially drunk glass of some amber liquor sitting behind the bar that's probably safe to say is his.]
[One of Cloud's friends is a quadrupedal feline-ish teenager who pretends to be an adult, another one is an animatronic cat mascot, and another one literally sleeps in a coffin. Cloud long ago lost any sense of what's unusual and what isn't.
The door already being open so he can just walk in like a normal person instead of waiting around for a warden to open it is pretty nice, he'll admit.
He moseys over to the bar and leans on it, arms folded.]
[Slowly he looks up from what he's doing, a brow raising slowly as he looks over the body language with a soft bit of a snort. Oh, he looks like he's going to be fun in a slightly obnoxious way. He finally sets the glass back with the others, leaning against the counter in turn.]
You want something to drink while I ask probably the same fuckin' questions every other warden before me has? Might as well make it worth your while.
[Husk is the first warden Cloud's had who's been this refreshingly casual. The fact that he's a bartender doesn't hurt, either, even if the Lounge is nothing like Seventh Heaven.]
[And old-fashioned says enough about a person, or so he's learned in his time of slinging hooch like this. He shifts for a moment, going to grab a glass, letting his tail slowly flick behind him and be at least somewhat seen.]
You prefer brandy or whiskey for it? Hell, some people even go with bourbon. More of a whiskey man myself, but pick your poison, kid.
["Kid"? How old is this guy, anyway? Hard to tell, what with the whole cat-bird thing. Cloud wonders if that's common for the world Husk is from, or if he's more like Nanaki.]
[He could always ask if he wanted to, not like he has a problem giving a ballpark answer at this point. But given the way he dresses, it would be easy enough to guess if Cloud was... from Earth, unfortunately.]
Bourbon, then. [Luckily it's not a complicated drink and he's pretty quick on the uptake anyway as he sets a glass down in front of him and grabs his own.]
How long you been here, then? I ain't gonna lie to you that I'm on the newer end of this madness.
[He would sure hope so, otherwise he needs his standing as a bartender removed from him for failing something that simple. Though it's still nice to see the approval even while he takes a drink from his own glass, not seeming to even flinch at whatever it is.]
Sounds about right, everyone I've met that's been here that long says time seems to fly in this place. Some people it's for the better to be here and others.... less so, I suppose. [Hell has its ups and downs, if he were honest.] Go on and ask me somethin' if you want, nothing's off bounds for me and I'm a pretty open book 'bout most things. Fair's fair and all that.
Mm. Not sure it'd be for the better for me if I didn't have a bunch of my friends here. But at least I chose to be here.
[Cloud takes another sip and nods.] Time does fly...guess it's because there's always a dozen things going on at once.
[He glances up at Husk and tilts his head, then finally decides to sit down on a stool and think about the offer. He considers asking what kind of world Husk is from, but then it clicks--]
Wait a second, aren't you the guy who said you were from hell?
Chose to be here? And here I thought inmates got brought here more or less against their will or with a choice where you couldn't really say no. [That's... curious, really. Hm.
He goes quiet for the longest moment at the question, taking another drink with a small humming noise. Yeah, he probably sticks out in a crowd in that particular regard.]
One of 'em. Sinner demon, specifically, means I was a living human at one point and then when I died and ended up in Hell, also ended up like this.
Most do. Figure the Admiral would've nabbed me anyway even if I'd said no, but...he didn't have to.
[Cloud's view of things has shifted some over time, but that much at least wouldn't change even if he had it to do over again.
He's patient during Husk's silence, just sipping his own drink in the meantime. His brows lift slightly in some curiosity once the reply comes, then furrow slightly as he considers that.]
But you're a warden. So you must've done something right, at least as far as the Admiral's concerned. Why the transformation?
That so... [He almost wants to ask what he was doing that made that choice so obvious for him, but he leaves that be for now. Especially since the curiosity actually does earn a bit of amusement out of him, a grin climbing to his lips and showing those sharp teeth while he does so.]
Now ain't that the million dollar question? Could be that the Admiral's idea of good or moralistic or whatever-the-fuck is different than Heaven or Hell's definitions of it. Or that maybe I changed for the better when I got knocked off my pedestal of being an Overlord and put onto a collar and leash, hard to say without knowin' what that standard even is. [Another drink and a shrug.] Wasn't a good enough change for Heaven, anyway.
[It seems odd that Husk doesn't know why he's a warden, but then again, Cloud has noticed that most wardens don't actually seem to have as many answers as one would think.
The rest is more unexpected. He may not know much about the ins and outs of Hell, but "overlord" seems pretty self-explanatory. He'd assume "collar and leash" were metaphorical, except, well. The guy is a cat...]
[Doesn't much help that his view of his own self isn't the best and yet he's still here and still doing stuff. And doesn't recognize the good qualities about himself or things he's done. It's fine, don't worry about it.
Normally he'd be more, well, catty about these details. But by this point in time, it doesn't much matter anymore.]
Some things from life carry over into death, I was a gambler. Overlords deal in souls, taking them in contracts, that's how you got power. I took a bet I couldn't win and ended up having to trade my own in order to keep even a semblance of my power still. [A slow bit of a shrug as he finishes off the rest of his glass and goes to pour himself some more.] Ended up at his beck and call for whatever he wanted, but I guess in the scheme of things who I ended up with isn't that bad since the asshole at least is annoying instead of malicious.
[At his beck and call...Cloud glances down into his glass for a moment. He knows what that's like, even if the details are all wrong. But he's pretty sure his soul never entered into it - at least, not before he died and the Admiral intercepted his soul before he could return to the planet.
Cloud finishes his drink, too, and sets the glass down.]
Maybe the Admiral figured you already had a taste of your own medicine and didn't need any more. [A pause.] As for me...I stopped an alien from destroying humanity and they called me a hero for it, but I never felt like one. Not after all the shit I did...and failed to do, along the way.
[His tone slides into a kind of bitter disgust, aimed at himself like a blade.] And afterward, I abandoned everybody who cared about me when they needed me. Ran away to wallow in self-pity and wait around for death. And my friends, my family...they suffered for it. So yeah, I wanted to come here. Figure out my shit and do better, for them.
Maybe, ain't much left for an old washed up man like me. [It's far more matter-of-fact that it really ought to be. But he lets him talk, ears flicking forward in oddly more interest in the last part. Man, if he hates one thing about this cat bit, it's this feature.]
You already got a start on shit, then. Getting out of that self-pity spiral's the way to do it, whether you really believe you deserve it or not. [He shifts a little, claws lightly tapping on the bar top.] Though with the way you're talkin' about everything, it seems you still got a bit more to get over for yourself before you can help anyone else. [He might be preaching to the choir, he's pretty damn sure and he wasn't exactly asked for his thoughts on any of it.]
But lemme guess: you continuously think about all the things you coulda done different, what you coulda said differently. All the what-ifs, could-ifs, should-haves. Which ain't gonna do anything other than frustrate you and paralyze you from moving forward, ask me how I fuckin' know, kid.
[Cloud, on the other hand, is glad to have the hints those ears give him! He likes cats.
Husk may not have been asked for his thoughts, but Cloud listens to them anyway, with a thoughtful frown. It turns into a slight smile at the end there, though.]
Think I can take a guess. [Then back to the frown.] I know. I know I'm supposed to be focusing on myself, letting go of the past, moving forward...but it's not that easy.
I put on a better act than you might think. I ain't shit back home, not anymore.
[At least someone likes them, he sure the fuck does not. Nor does he ever not give his opinion unless told specifically not to, especially given the last time he did it... ended up working out for him, oddly enough. But the smile isn't quite expected as he tilts his head somewhat, hm.]
Lemme ask you something, then: is anything easy worth doing? If something's easy, it ain't gonna push you forward, it ain't gonna make you grow, so what's the fuckin' point.
[The announcement caught him off-guard, too, but not unpleasantly. Fred's been his older sister and his supervisor - the idea that she'd end up as his warden, too, almost seems like a natural conclusion. He's relieved, not only to finally have a permanent warden at all, but to have one he already knows and feels comfortable with. One he knows he can trust.
On the other hand, he's nervous, too. Permanent wardens get their inmates' files, so she's seen his whole life laid out on paper, or she will soon. She and Sephiroth are now the only two people who know everything about him, everything he's done, all his failures and weaknesses and stupid, selfish moments. What will she think of him?]
Um...hey. Yeah, I'm fine. Mm...no, better than fine. Took the Admiral long enough, but...I'm glad it's you.
You are? Oh, that's a relief. Really. I wasn't sure how you'd feel about the whole thing. I'm still a tiny bit wobbly about that, myself. But I guess this just means we've got some more time together, right?
[ She pauses, then, knowing what she should address next, but not quite wanting to address it. ]
I- I...know we're not on the Narrenschiff here. But I still don't feel right reading your file without offering something in return. And I haven't read it yet, just to be clear. But I was thinking I'd type up my history, and maybe we could go through both of them together? Then you can know all the crazy things my non-Breach self has been through, too.
[It's an agreement - more time together, which is a good thing in his book, even if some of it will be difficult.
He's not too surprised by her offer, knowing the sort of person she is, but he appreciates it all the same. Particularly since for the last little while, Cloud's started to feel the divide between himself and all his warden friends more keenly, for various reasons - and this recent "bill of rights" thing really isn't helping. It's nice to have a warden who's not drawing that line so sharply.
[ Fred doesn't care for the distinction, honestly. Especially the names. She signed the bill of rights because it's at least something? Something that they can mostly agree on as a way to treat each other. That it excludes half the population is a flaw, not a feature.
She smiles at his agreement. ]
Oh, good. It'll probably take me a week or so to write it up, so in the meantime...
[ There was something else she could do as a permanent warden, what was it... ] Ah! Right. I actually don't know if you've had any dampened powers or magic, anything like that. But if you do, I can ask for them to be restored. If you'd want that. I know sometimes they're more trouble than they're worth.
[Cloud knew this question would come sooner or later. He frowns, conflicted.]
I have, and I do, but...dunno if I should just yet.
[He glances down at his palm.]
Might make more sense once you read my file. I'm - I was a supersoldier, but how I became one...it had a lot of consequences, and it was all wrapped up in my sense of self. Thought I'd be able to figure out who I am without 'em, who I really am, before I got 'em back, but...
[He shrugs. It's hard to explain, and he's not sure he completely understands it himself.]
[ Fred nods, knowingly. It always comes with strings attached, in her world. She expected some hesitance. ]
Okay. Let's work through the file, and talk what we can out. And whenever you feel like you might be ready for 'em, you just let me know. The sense of self is the way more important thing.
After calling Cloud over, she'll wait in the 'office' part of her cabin with the door open for her inmate to arrive. The tables she'd used to form a taco bar previously are now separated into two- she has both his file and a giant stack of printed paper next to it.
This would hopefully be like ripping off a bandaid. A little painful, but good to do. For both of them, even. She ends up staring at the papers while she fidgets with her pencil.
So it's finally time to do this. The one thing he's been dreading most since coming aboard the Barge. And, even worse, he's going to be there to watch her read it. He gets to see her reactions to all his fuck-ups in real-time. Great. Just what he needed.
But as his warden, she's gotta know sooner or later, so he prefers sooner to get it over with. And he does appreciate her putting in all that effort to write out her own life story for a more mutual exchange. There's a part of him that's telling him to relax, that it's Fred and it'll be fine, she'd never think less of him for anything. But he knows that's just Officer Sunny talking, and he has no such confidence in reality.
He tries not to seem nervous when he lets himself into her office, but he's been walking with his eyes cast downward. Come on, Strife, get it together. It wasn't that long ago that he was telling Tifa some of this stuff over the phone, so this shouldn't be that bad. Right?
He lifts his gaze once he gets there, but doesn't manage to get a greeting out. Just announcing himself with his presence alone. Not like she doesn't know what he's here for.
"Hi, Cloud. Come on in and have a seat. Let's get this over with, huh?" she says, a small but slightly nervous smile on her face.
"And let me know if you need any snacks or drinks or anything else while we're doing this. I just figured that this space is kinda collaborative, but also quiet and private." 'Collaborative'? That's a weird word. But it's out there now, so...
"You want me to start with mine? I could get us started."
Cloud sits across from her and glances around. 'Collaborative' is kind of a weird word for what this is, but he can appreciate that that's maybe what it feels like to her. Or what she's trying to make it feel like, maybe.
He shakes his head. "Nah, I'm good. And I'd rather do mine first, just to get it done."
Fred looks down at the files, then nods. "Okay, yours first. We can take a break and switch- or just stop- anytime you need. I'll try to keep an eye out, but please, tell me if you can."
She expects him to get stuck in his head at least once during this whole thing. She's not going to push this just to get it done (as much as they both might like that).
She carefully slides his file towards her, just enough so she can open it. The text faces her, and she starts reading aloud. She'll glance up at him every so often, just to make sure he's not shutting down.
He's not, and he might, but hell if he's going to sit here and admit to it. It's just a bunch of words, he shouldn't need breaks.
The file begins with a summary of his childhood. How he was too shy to fit in, fearless enough to save a friend doing something dangerous but unable to convince anyone he wasn't the one to put her in danger in the first place. How he covered up his loneliness and lack of self-esteem with arrogance and hostility, which didn't help him or his single mother, whom the village looked down on for not getting re-married after Cloud's father died when he was an infant.
Starting off strong for the Strifes, apparently.
Present-day Cloud folds his arms and looks down while she reads, brow slightly furrowed. The truth is, there's a lot about his early life he doesn't remember very well even now - some of it was just irretrievable, especially the details. But he still remembers the feelings. He remembers the loneliness, the longing to be a part of Tifa's friend group, the way he blamed himself even then for being an unlikable weirdo. He remembers getting into too many fights despite being smaller than the rest of the boys, and how losing or getting hurt never stopped him from doing it again. He remembers convincing himself he was better than everyone else so he could pretend he was always alone by choice.
Maybe that's why he developed such an obsession with joining SOLDIER, Shinra's elite fighting force of supersoldiers - the best of the best. And the best of those was Sephiroth, the Demon of Wutai, the hero of Midgar. Everyone loved Sephiroth! If Cloud was a hero like that, then everyone would have to love him, too. Especially Tifa.
So as soon as he was old enough - the spring before his 14th birthday - he left his village behind and moved to Midgar, the biggest city in the world, to join Shinra Public Security as an infantry trooper. He intended for that stint to be short-lived, but when he applied for the SOLDIER program once he turned 14, he was turned down. He studied hard, trained hard, tried again and again and again, but was rejected every time.
Needless to say, his self-esteem sure wasn't getting any better.
Fred suppresses the desire to roll her eyes at his insistence that he's 'good'. Honestly, she's sure she's heard Angel say something exactly that way, and it wasn't like he was 'good' at the time, either! But she keeps her response to an eye twitch and a nod. No need to give him a hard time when the file was already going to do so.
As she reads, she finds her heart already going out to him. It's not like she was the Popular Girl during her public school experience, after all. She's also honestly a little surprised to see Sephiroth described as a Hero, but- it makes some sense. There has to be something between them that Cloud caught onto. And aspiring to be a hero for everyone, to be loved, that's just life.
She ends up stopping her reading for her own question. "They let you join up at fourteen? No, thirteen. That's- I wouldn't have even been able to work a summer job at that age. I know it's different worlds and all, but we don't do military service until eighteen years old."
"Mm?" Cloud glances up. "Sure, why not? Most kids waited another year or two, but thirteen wasn't unheard of or anything." What the hell do teenagers even do with themselves all the time in her world if they can't get jobs?
Once Fred starts reading again, the file says that a few years passed with no change in Cloud's situation, and since he was too ashamed to report back to his mother and Tifa that he was a failure and all that boasting had come to nothing, he just...didn't go back to visit the village at all.
Things started to look up for Cloud when he was sixteen, because he was assigned to a mission with Zack Fair, SOLDIER Second Class - a name Fred likely recognizes as a warden on the Barge. Zack was impressed with how well he kept up and how he never hesitated to give everything his all regardless of the odds. They became fast friends, which was something Cloud had never had before. Zack was supportive and upbeat, and he encouraged Cloud to embrace his dreams - to keep his head up, keep trying. Cloud looked up to him as both his best friend and a role model, especially after Zack's promotion to First Class.
Eventually, they were both assigned to a mission with Sephiroth to inspect the mako reactor just outside Nibelheim, taking Cloud home for the first time in nearly three years. That mission was the first time he'd had the chance to spend any time with Sephiroth, and found the hero a quiet, thoughtful man full of curiosity and gentle sass, who was kind to Cloud and spoke to him warmly despite the massive gap between their ranks.
The shame of Cloud's continued failure (as he saw it) led him to keep his helmet on so none of the villagers would know it was him, including Tifa - and then everything fell apart. Sephiroth learned of his origins as a science project for Shinra, a hybrid of human and alien DNA from an ancient, excavated corpse. He spent a week obsessively devouring every scrap of information about the project he could find, and then he burned the entire village to the ground and killed the villagers. Cloud tried to save his mother, but passed out in the attempt after desperately texting Zack for help. By the time he came to, everyone was already dead.
He followed Sephiroth and Zack all the way up the mountain to the reactor. By the time he got there, Sephiroth had defeated Zack, killed Tifa's father, nearly killed Tifa, and was in the process of stealing the remains of Jenova - the alien he now believed was his true "mother." Cloud grabbed Zack's enormous sword and took Sephiroth by surprise, stabbing him in the back. Sephiroth survived and was furious. Cloud tried to finish him off but ended up impaled on Sephiroth's sword instead. Somehow, he managed to drag himself further along the blade and then use it to fling Sephiroth into the reactor's core, killing him.
Cloud and Zack were in the process of bleeding out when Hojo, the scientist responsible for the Jenova Project, captured them and took them back to his secret lab.
She's about to argue the literal child soldier thing, but she honestly knows she wouldn't get too far. It's how this world works, telling as it is, and they have much farther to go. So she merely says, "Hmm." And then she's reading on.
After reading the bit about working with Zack, her one comment is, "He does seem like that kinda guy. Glad I didn't have him pegged wrong."
The rest of it, Fred read without comment. But she can't help but to frown, and by the time she reaches Hojo, there are tears on her face. "Oh no," she practically whispers, and she looks up to Cloud. "I'm so sorry, Cloud. For all of you. I- I'll keep reading, I know there's a bunch more, but this is not something anyone should've had to go through."
Cloud can tell she's not a fan, but he's not sure why and she doesn't press him on it, so he lets it drop, too.
Her comment about Zack marks the closest Cloud has come to smiling all day, even if he's still not quite there. "Mm. Zack's the best." Then his face falls back into pensive anticipation, knowing what's coming next in the file. Zack's the best, and Cloud's the reason he died.
When he sees the tears start to well up in her eyes, that's when he starts thinking maybe he should leave after all. She doesn't strictly need him here to read this, right? He got this kind of reaction once already when he told Aerith the truth of what happened, and he really doesn't want to endure it again. By the time she looks up, his gaze is firmly elsewhere.
"Should's got nothin' to do with it," he mutters. "It happened, it was a long time ago, it's over and done."
But he sticks around for now, at least, as she keeps reading.
The file explains events in such clear and chronological terms that it sounds bizarre to Cloud. His memories of childhood may be vague and distant, but his memories of this portion are nearly incomprehensible - nothing but brief, foggy snippets of pain and confusion and fear drenched in green, bracketing huge gaps of absolutely nothing. And he didn't learn what really happened or why until much, much later.
What Fred reads is that Hojo was testing what he called the Jenova Reunion Theory. Jenova was a mimetic, psychic predator with the ability to absorb the memories and forms of its prey, as well as merge its own genes with other life forms, mutating them to be more like it. Sephiroth was the perfect hybrid Hojo wanted, so he moved on to a different hypothesis: that bits of Jenova's genetic material separated from the source would act to rejoin that source, influencing their hosts' minds and bodies to reunite with the whole. To test this, Hojo used Sephiroth's cells and infusions of mako - the lifeblood of the world, the material element of the Lifestream, which contains the memories and knowledge of every soul to ever have lived on the Planet and then died to return to it - to create so-called 'Sephiroth clones' and spread them out across the world.
Zack already having been a SOLDIER with a First's level of mako infusion made him immune to the experiments, so Hojo declared him a failure. Cloud, on the other hand, was found to be so susceptible to the deleterious effects of mako on the human brain that he suffered severe brain damage from mako poisoning over time and, eventually, fell into an amnesiac and catatonic state that really should have been permanent, medically speaking. Hojo declared him a failure, too.
But after four years of captivity, Zack broke them both out. He found a spare SOLDIER's uniform to replace Cloud's mako-soaked clothes and then escaped, taking the catatonic Cloud with him. For another year, Zack kept Cloud safe and alive as he avoided Shinra's forces, traveling across two continents to get back to Midgar and bringing Cloud along every step of the way, taking care of him and talking to him as if he could respond.
Meanwhile, Sephiroth's body had returned to the Planet as usual when he died, but his mind was so alien to the Lifestream and his will to maintain his memories and identity so powerful that eventually, after five years, his consciousness awoke from inside the Lifestream. Cloud's genetic and psychic connection to him plus his natural tenacity and survival instinct combined to allow him to slowly claw back to consciousness as Sephiroth did; and since the mako had scoured away so many of his memories, drowning them out with its billions of identities and lifetimes of knowledge, that connection took hold strongly.
Cloud gradually became more aware of his surroundings until he could almost respond...just as Shinra caught up to them with an army. And then this happened.
Fred takes a moment to collect herself after her apology. She disagrees with his assessment, but of course he would. He's had to carry this for ages. Her job is to help him, not get over-emotional about what happened to a friend. To do that, she needs them both to get through this, the whole thing. All the details.
So she nods to herself, wipes her face, and takes a deep breath before diving further. She's frowning, but promises herself not to show anything else until they get through it. She can always break down on her own time.
And boy, does it get worse. Her jaw sets as she continues reading about Hojo. She asks about mako and the Lifestream in a little more detail, but for the most part she's interested in plowing through it.
She manages not to cry while reading over Zack's escape and his journey to Midgar, and subsequent death. "He really is the best, isn't he?" she says quietly.
Fred barely even realizes what she's doing as she tugs on her work overalls and near-sprints to Cloud's cabin. She hadn't even had breakfast, much less braided up her hair. She knocks on the door before she realizes she could've just called. This seemed better?
Cloud, too, has felt weirdly impatient about meeting up with Fred this morning, though at first he interprets it as a stress-related anticipation to get to work. Which still doesn't explain why it's bugging him so much, but it means that by the time Fred knocks, Cloud's already got his tool belt on and is on his way to leaving the cabin anyway.
This results in the door opening about half a second after Fred knocks on it, and there's Cloud, blinking at her in a bit of surprise - though this feels right, somehow, even though normally he just meets her at the maintenance office.
"Oh - hey." He finds himself relaxing, suddenly. The impulse to hurry simply vanishes. His brow furrows. "...weird. You feel that, too?"
Fred smiles at him and says, "Good morning, Cloud!" It's more energy than she usually puts into greetings at work, fueled by whatever has been rushing her.
But- yeah. She's suddenly feeling like everything's right, now that she's here. Confusion flickers across her face. "Like the 'hurry up and go' has turned into 'everything is fine' all of a sudden?"
"Exactly like that." Cloud frowns, thinking. He'd thought he was in a big hurry to get to work, but if he's already doing whatever it was that impulse wanted him to do, then...it's not about work, it's about Fred.
"Guess it's a good thing we're headed to the same place for now."
Fred's mind is going along the same idea, but she's not entirely sure about it. So she tests it out. She suddenly backs up, away from Cloud a few feet...and then makes a face.
She steps forward towards Cloud again, and that awful feeling is gone. "Oof. Guess it is. I'm still not used to these floods happenin' so often. Never had anything like this before. But when we're close, we're fine, huh?"
She tilts her head to the side and makes space for him in the hallway. They can talk while they walk. She's not entirely worried about this one yet, weird as it is.
When Fred backs away, Cloud's eyes narrow slightly and his jaw tenses. Something's wrong. He relaxes again with a quiet breath when she comes close again. "Seems that way," he agrees.
He steps out and locks his door before walking alongside Fred, taking care to keep pace with her even if it's slightly slower than he usually walks.
"Wonder what happens if we get too far apart...nothing good, I'm sure." If this is a warden-inmate thing, then he hopes Sephiroth went to find Yunlan instead of being stubborn and stupid about it. But probably not. Sephiroth also may not be a huge fan of Cloud staying close to Fred until whatever this is ends...well, they'll cross that bridge when they come to it.
"Um...what're we gonna do after our shifts in maintenance are over?"
"We'll have to test how far we can go. Or wait until someone mentions it on the network, I suppose, but I always think running your own tests is the best bet. Maybe we should wait until there's someone to watch us? I dunno. If this has hit everyone, there might be a lot of call-outs today."
Her hair is falling in front of her face- she didn't have time to braid it today. So she sweeps it back as best she can and fidgets with the ends. "That'll inform how we continue, though. I'd like to give you as much space as I can. But if my guess is correct, we'll probably be sleeping in the same room for a week. Sorry, Cloud."
"Mm. Yeah, testing it ourselves is best. Might as well do it now, so we know what we're in for." Cloud shrugs. "Sleeping in the same room doesn't bother me. Just a little worried about Sephiroth. He uh..." His gaze is fixed somewhere on the floor ahead of them in slight embarrassment. "He can get...pretty jealous. Over nothing. Hoping it won't be like that this time, since he'll probably be hanging out with Yunlan anyway, but just in case, I'll check in with him later. Don't worry," he adds hurriedly. "Even if he is, he's not gonna come after you or anything. Just sit and sulk in the dark until I go kick his ass about it."
He stops, then. "Okay. You stay here, I'll start walking backwards. I'll keep going until you say stop, or until I can't. Ready?"
"I'll do my best to not give him reasons to worry, or reasons for you to kick his ass," Fred asserts with a small smile and a nod. She doesn't look worried. She understands over-protective and jealous, at least a little. Especially considering all they've been through. She's hardly going to take it personally.
The experiment, then! She nods as he explains it, and lets him step back away from her. The distance immediately makes her feel queasy, but she bears with it until he's a little over 20 feet away. "Okay, stop! Stop stop. I don't think it's going to...to max out or whatever." She's leaning against the wall at this point, using it to keep her upright as she walks back towards him. "Think it would just knock us out if we went too much further...urgh..."
With each step Cloud takes, it feels like claws scraping louder and louder against a chalkboard inside his head. By 10 feet or so, there's a kind of static behind his eyes that's making him feel dizzy, but he puts a hand out to steady himself against the wall and keeps moving. He grits his teeth as his head pounds, but he's not giving up until Fred gives the word. They have to know their limits.
She finally tells him to stop and he does, letting himself stagger against the wall and squeezing his eyes shut with a quiet groan until she's close enough that it lets up some. He lets out a breath of relief and frustration both at once as he starts moving toward her, too.
"Probably, yeah. Not too much room for error, then." When she's almost within reach, he holds out a hand to shorten the distance more quickly and help steady her, if she needs it.
Fred takes the hand and- oh. The awful vertigo dissipates entirely. "That...well now, that feels a lot better. Thanks. And...sorry. I really should've called it off sooner. I thought maybe it'd reach a max discomfort at some point, but I should've known. That's not how floods tend to work. Are you all right?"
She knows he'll probably say he's fine, but Cloud's body has been through a lot. There might be a lingering headache or something.
Cloud blinks as, indeed, a lingering discomfort he didn't even realize was there just vanishes the moment Fred takes his hand. "Huh." Then he shrugs without letting go and, predictably, says, "Fine. Had to push it to its limits or it wouldn't be much of a test."
Then there's a pause that's only a little awkward. "Guess we should just...hold on, for now. While it's easy, might as well."
She nods a bit when he says he's fine. If she just leaves that bit of hope open, maybe he'll actually think it over, eventually.
"That works for me, if it works for you," she says, squeezing his hand gently. "I'm guessing this is hitting the whole ship, so no one's gonna think the wrong thing about us holding hands." Probably not even Sephiroth, although the jury is out on him. "We're probably doing better than most, considering we work together already. But, um, let me know if you need some space- like, mental space. I promise I don't have to be talkin' all the time."
There have been numerous times in Maintenance when she hasn't said much at all, in fact. She will get extremely focused on one project or another. But being actually tethered together makes this situation feel a little different.
Cloud Strife, think over whether he's actually fine or not? Next she'll be wanting pigs to fly...
"Sure," he confirms, squeezing lightly back. "Don't much care what anybody else thinks about it." Except Sephiroth, of course, but that's a given. He'll get in touch telepathically in a bit and head that off at the pass, just in case.
"Good point. Might be the only ones still working today." Which is fine with Cloud.
He glances over at her at the offer, brows slightly raised. "Even if you did, I don't mind." Granted, he would definitely mind if it was a lot of other people. But not Fred.
"Really?" She asks, smiling a bit as she takes that in. Cloud could tolerate a lot, but he wouldn't say so unless he meant it. "Thanks. Looks like it's gonna be an okay week for us, then. I know a few people are probably going to have it tough."
As they're walking to the office, she thinks over what they have waiting for them. "Y'know, I bet we could probably hold down Maintenance ourselves if we had to. There's not as many projects as there have been in the past. Of course, no one's come around messing up the place either, recently. It's practically serene, compared to what I'm used to."
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
onlyembers
backdated to a few days after the breach
Date: 2025-02-13 07:28 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2025-02-13 08:21 pm (UTC)Archer will find Cloud standing near a few clusters of flowers with a focused look, hand at his chin in thought as he considers them carefully.
Text
Date: 2025-03-16 08:03 am (UTC)Or not. It's up to you, honestly, not like I do fuckall much else outside of working.
text!
Date: 2025-03-16 08:22 am (UTC)At least this guy seems fairly chill so far.]
Yeah. I've seen you around at the Lounge, you're the bartender, right?
On my way.
[It doesn't take him long to make his way to the Lounge, where he...knocks on the door, if it isn't already open.]
no subject
Date: 2025-03-16 08:25 am (UTC)[Husk's not the type to not leave the door open at this point, the whole difference between inmate and warden is stupid as fuck to him and evidently it seems everyone else agrees as he's yet to hear any arguments about it yet.
And he's seeming pretty chill still at this point, casually cleaning glasses while it seems quiet in there, though there's a partially drunk glass of some amber liquor sitting behind the bar that's probably safe to say is his.]
no subject
Date: 2025-03-16 08:32 am (UTC)The door already being open so he can just walk in like a normal person instead of waiting around for a warden to open it is pretty nice, he'll admit.
He moseys over to the bar and leans on it, arms folded.]
Hey.
no subject
Date: 2025-03-16 08:36 am (UTC)You want something to drink while I ask probably the same fuckin' questions every other warden before me has? Might as well make it worth your while.
no subject
Date: 2025-03-16 08:46 am (UTC)Sure. I'll have...an old-fashioned.
no subject
Date: 2025-03-16 08:48 am (UTC)You prefer brandy or whiskey for it? Hell, some people even go with bourbon. More of a whiskey man myself, but pick your poison, kid.
no subject
Date: 2025-03-16 08:53 am (UTC)Hm. Bourbon.
no subject
Date: 2025-03-16 08:55 am (UTC)Bourbon, then. [Luckily it's not a complicated drink and he's pretty quick on the uptake anyway as he sets a glass down in front of him and grabs his own.]
How long you been here, then? I ain't gonna lie to you that I'm on the newer end of this madness.
no subject
Date: 2025-03-16 09:00 am (UTC)S'been...almost a year. Doesn't feel like that long, though.
no subject
Date: 2025-03-16 09:03 am (UTC)Sounds about right, everyone I've met that's been here that long says time seems to fly in this place. Some people it's for the better to be here and others.... less so, I suppose. [Hell has its ups and downs, if he were honest.] Go on and ask me somethin' if you want, nothing's off bounds for me and I'm a pretty open book 'bout most things. Fair's fair and all that.
no subject
Date: 2025-03-16 09:13 am (UTC)[Cloud takes another sip and nods.] Time does fly...guess it's because there's always a dozen things going on at once.
[He glances up at Husk and tilts his head, then finally decides to sit down on a stool and think about the offer. He considers asking what kind of world Husk is from, but then it clicks--]
Wait a second, aren't you the guy who said you were from hell?
no subject
Date: 2025-03-16 09:16 am (UTC)He goes quiet for the longest moment at the question, taking another drink with a small humming noise. Yeah, he probably sticks out in a crowd in that particular regard.]
One of 'em. Sinner demon, specifically, means I was a living human at one point and then when I died and ended up in Hell, also ended up like this.
no subject
Date: 2025-03-16 09:28 am (UTC)[Cloud's view of things has shifted some over time, but that much at least wouldn't change even if he had it to do over again.
He's patient during Husk's silence, just sipping his own drink in the meantime. His brows lift slightly in some curiosity once the reply comes, then furrow slightly as he considers that.]
But you're a warden. So you must've done something right, at least as far as the Admiral's concerned. Why the transformation?
no subject
Date: 2025-03-16 09:31 am (UTC)Now ain't that the million dollar question? Could be that the Admiral's idea of good or moralistic or whatever-the-fuck is different than Heaven or Hell's definitions of it. Or that maybe I changed for the better when I got knocked off my pedestal of being an Overlord and put onto a collar and leash, hard to say without knowin' what that standard even is. [Another drink and a shrug.] Wasn't a good enough change for Heaven, anyway.
no subject
Date: 2025-03-16 09:46 am (UTC)[It seems odd that Husk doesn't know why he's a warden, but then again, Cloud has noticed that most wardens don't actually seem to have as many answers as one would think.
The rest is more unexpected. He may not know much about the ins and outs of Hell, but "overlord" seems pretty self-explanatory. He'd assume "collar and leash" were metaphorical, except, well. The guy is a cat...]
So you were a big shot. What happened?
no subject
Date: 2025-03-16 09:50 am (UTC)Normally he'd be more, well, catty about these details. But by this point in time, it doesn't much matter anymore.]
Some things from life carry over into death, I was a gambler. Overlords deal in souls, taking them in contracts, that's how you got power. I took a bet I couldn't win and ended up having to trade my own in order to keep even a semblance of my power still. [A slow bit of a shrug as he finishes off the rest of his glass and goes to pour himself some more.] Ended up at his beck and call for whatever he wanted, but I guess in the scheme of things who I ended up with isn't that bad since the asshole at least is annoying instead of malicious.
no subject
Date: 2025-03-16 10:14 am (UTC)Cloud finishes his drink, too, and sets the glass down.]
Maybe the Admiral figured you already had a taste of your own medicine and didn't need any more. [A pause.] As for me...I stopped an alien from destroying humanity and they called me a hero for it, but I never felt like one. Not after all the shit I did...and failed to do, along the way.
[His tone slides into a kind of bitter disgust, aimed at himself like a blade.] And afterward, I abandoned everybody who cared about me when they needed me. Ran away to wallow in self-pity and wait around for death. And my friends, my family...they suffered for it. So yeah, I wanted to come here. Figure out my shit and do better, for them.
no subject
Date: 2025-03-16 10:20 am (UTC)You already got a start on shit, then. Getting out of that self-pity spiral's the way to do it, whether you really believe you deserve it or not. [He shifts a little, claws lightly tapping on the bar top.] Though with the way you're talkin' about everything, it seems you still got a bit more to get over for yourself before you can help anyone else. [He might be preaching to the choir, he's pretty damn sure and he wasn't exactly asked for his thoughts on any of it.]
But lemme guess: you continuously think about all the things you coulda done different, what you coulda said differently. All the what-ifs, could-ifs, should-haves. Which ain't gonna do anything other than frustrate you and paralyze you from moving forward, ask me how I fuckin' know, kid.
no subject
Date: 2025-03-19 10:36 pm (UTC)[Cloud, on the other hand, is glad to have the hints those ears give him! He likes cats.
Husk may not have been asked for his thoughts, but Cloud listens to them anyway, with a thoughtful frown. It turns into a slight smile at the end there, though.]
Think I can take a guess. [Then back to the frown.] I know. I know I'm supposed to be focusing on myself, letting go of the past, moving forward...but it's not that easy.
no subject
Date: 2025-03-24 08:02 am (UTC)[At least someone likes them, he sure the fuck does not. Nor does he ever not give his opinion unless told specifically not to, especially given the last time he did it... ended up working out for him, oddly enough. But the smile isn't quite expected as he tilts his head somewhat, hm.]
Lemme ask you something, then: is anything easy worth doing? If something's easy, it ain't gonna push you forward, it ain't gonna make you grow, so what's the fuckin' point.
Backdated to last month, jesus
Date: 2025-03-23 12:23 pm (UTC)<3
Date: 2025-03-25 09:36 am (UTC)Marriage, huh? No dice unless you can beat my boyfriend in single combat. Spoiler: you can't.
1/2
Date: 2025-03-27 06:15 pm (UTC)Re: <3
Date: 2025-03-27 06:17 pm (UTC)--I mean. Don't be so sure about that; I could probably beat his ass. But whatever. This is where I ask if you need anything or whatever.
After the pairing announcement, video
Date: 2025-04-05 02:22 am (UTC)Cloud? Um, hi! I really didn't expect- well, it'd been a couple of months for me and I- are you okay?
video!
Date: 2025-04-05 10:19 am (UTC)On the other hand, he's nervous, too. Permanent wardens get their inmates' files, so she's seen his whole life laid out on paper, or she will soon. She and Sephiroth are now the only two people who know everything about him, everything he's done, all his failures and weaknesses and stupid, selfish moments. What will she think of him?]
Um...hey. Yeah, I'm fine. Mm...no, better than fine. Took the Admiral long enough, but...I'm glad it's you.
Re: video!
Date: 2025-04-14 10:04 pm (UTC)[ She pauses, then, knowing what she should address next, but not quite wanting to address it. ]
I- I...know we're not on the Narrenschiff here. But I still don't feel right reading your file without offering something in return. And I haven't read it yet, just to be clear. But I was thinking I'd type up my history, and maybe we could go through both of them together? Then you can know all the crazy things my non-Breach self has been through, too.
Re: video!
Date: 2025-04-15 10:03 am (UTC)[It's an agreement - more time together, which is a good thing in his book, even if some of it will be difficult.
He's not too surprised by her offer, knowing the sort of person she is, but he appreciates it all the same. Particularly since for the last little while, Cloud's started to feel the divide between himself and all his warden friends more keenly, for various reasons - and this recent "bill of rights" thing really isn't helping. It's nice to have a warden who's not drawing that line so sharply.
He nods.]
Thanks. I'd like that.
Re: video!
Date: 2025-04-15 11:06 pm (UTC)She smiles at his agreement. ]
Oh, good. It'll probably take me a week or so to write it up, so in the meantime...
[ There was something else she could do as a permanent warden, what was it... ] Ah! Right. I actually don't know if you've had any dampened powers or magic, anything like that. But if you do, I can ask for them to be restored. If you'd want that. I know sometimes they're more trouble than they're worth.
Re: video!
Date: 2025-04-23 07:19 am (UTC)I have, and I do, but...dunno if I should just yet.
[He glances down at his palm.]
Might make more sense once you read my file. I'm - I was a supersoldier, but how I became one...it had a lot of consequences, and it was all wrapped up in my sense of self. Thought I'd be able to figure out who I am without 'em, who I really am, before I got 'em back, but...
[He shrugs. It's hard to explain, and he's not sure he completely understands it himself.]
Re: video!
Date: 2025-04-25 10:49 pm (UTC)Okay. Let's work through the file, and talk what we can out. And whenever you feel like you might be ready for 'em, you just let me know. The sense of self is the way more important thing.
And I'll help you find that. I promise.
Re: video!
Date: 2025-04-26 12:35 am (UTC)Okay.
After the 4WD event, spam
Date: 2025-04-30 01:48 am (UTC)This would hopefully be like ripping off a bandaid. A little painful, but good to do. For both of them, even. She ends up staring at the papers while she fidgets with her pencil.
no subject
Date: 2025-04-30 05:20 am (UTC)But as his warden, she's gotta know sooner or later, so he prefers sooner to get it over with. And he does appreciate her putting in all that effort to write out her own life story for a more mutual exchange. There's a part of him that's telling him to relax, that it's Fred and it'll be fine, she'd never think less of him for anything. But he knows that's just Officer Sunny talking, and he has no such confidence in reality.
He tries not to seem nervous when he lets himself into her office, but he's been walking with his eyes cast downward. Come on, Strife, get it together. It wasn't that long ago that he was telling Tifa some of this stuff over the phone, so this shouldn't be that bad. Right?
He lifts his gaze once he gets there, but doesn't manage to get a greeting out. Just announcing himself with his presence alone. Not like she doesn't know what he's here for.
no subject
Date: 2025-04-30 09:42 pm (UTC)"And let me know if you need any snacks or drinks or anything else while we're doing this. I just figured that this space is kinda collaborative, but also quiet and private." 'Collaborative'? That's a weird word. But it's out there now, so...
"You want me to start with mine? I could get us started."
no subject
Date: 2025-05-06 12:59 am (UTC)He shakes his head. "Nah, I'm good. And I'd rather do mine first, just to get it done."
no subject
Date: 2025-06-03 02:19 am (UTC)She expects him to get stuck in his head at least once during this whole thing. She's not going to push this just to get it done (as much as they both might like that).
She carefully slides his file towards her, just enough so she can open it. The text faces her, and she starts reading aloud. She'll glance up at him every so often, just to make sure he's not shutting down.
no subject
Date: 2025-06-03 07:46 am (UTC)He's not, and he might, but hell if he's going to sit here and admit to it. It's just a bunch of words, he shouldn't need breaks.
The file begins with a summary of his childhood. How he was too shy to fit in, fearless enough to save a friend doing something dangerous but unable to convince anyone he wasn't the one to put her in danger in the first place. How he covered up his loneliness and lack of self-esteem with arrogance and hostility, which didn't help him or his single mother, whom the village looked down on for not getting re-married after Cloud's father died when he was an infant.
Starting off strong for the Strifes, apparently.
Present-day Cloud folds his arms and looks down while she reads, brow slightly furrowed. The truth is, there's a lot about his early life he doesn't remember very well even now - some of it was just irretrievable, especially the details. But he still remembers the feelings. He remembers the loneliness, the longing to be a part of Tifa's friend group, the way he blamed himself even then for being an unlikable weirdo. He remembers getting into too many fights despite being smaller than the rest of the boys, and how losing or getting hurt never stopped him from doing it again. He remembers convincing himself he was better than everyone else so he could pretend he was always alone by choice.
Maybe that's why he developed such an obsession with joining SOLDIER, Shinra's elite fighting force of supersoldiers - the best of the best. And the best of those was Sephiroth, the Demon of Wutai, the hero of Midgar. Everyone loved Sephiroth! If Cloud was a hero like that, then everyone would have to love him, too. Especially Tifa.
So as soon as he was old enough - the spring before his 14th birthday - he left his village behind and moved to Midgar, the biggest city in the world, to join Shinra Public Security as an infantry trooper. He intended for that stint to be short-lived, but when he applied for the SOLDIER program once he turned 14, he was turned down. He studied hard, trained hard, tried again and again and again, but was rejected every time.
Needless to say, his self-esteem sure wasn't getting any better.
no subject
Date: 2025-06-04 02:23 am (UTC)As she reads, she finds her heart already going out to him. It's not like she was the Popular Girl during her public school experience, after all. She's also honestly a little surprised to see Sephiroth described as a Hero, but- it makes some sense. There has to be something between them that Cloud caught onto. And aspiring to be a hero for everyone, to be loved, that's just life.
She ends up stopping her reading for her own question. "They let you join up at fourteen? No, thirteen. That's- I wouldn't have even been able to work a summer job at that age. I know it's different worlds and all, but we don't do military service until eighteen years old."
no subject
Date: 2025-06-04 09:42 am (UTC)Once Fred starts reading again, the file says that a few years passed with no change in Cloud's situation, and since he was too ashamed to report back to his mother and Tifa that he was a failure and all that boasting had come to nothing, he just...didn't go back to visit the village at all.
Things started to look up for Cloud when he was sixteen, because he was assigned to a mission with Zack Fair, SOLDIER Second Class - a name Fred likely recognizes as a warden on the Barge. Zack was impressed with how well he kept up and how he never hesitated to give everything his all regardless of the odds. They became fast friends, which was something Cloud had never had before. Zack was supportive and upbeat, and he encouraged Cloud to embrace his dreams - to keep his head up, keep trying. Cloud looked up to him as both his best friend and a role model, especially after Zack's promotion to First Class.
Eventually, they were both assigned to a mission with Sephiroth to inspect the mako reactor just outside Nibelheim, taking Cloud home for the first time in nearly three years. That mission was the first time he'd had the chance to spend any time with Sephiroth, and found the hero a quiet, thoughtful man full of curiosity and gentle sass, who was kind to Cloud and spoke to him warmly despite the massive gap between their ranks.
The shame of Cloud's continued failure (as he saw it) led him to keep his helmet on so none of the villagers would know it was him, including Tifa - and then everything fell apart. Sephiroth learned of his origins as a science project for Shinra, a hybrid of human and alien DNA from an ancient, excavated corpse. He spent a week obsessively devouring every scrap of information about the project he could find, and then he burned the entire village to the ground and killed the villagers. Cloud tried to save his mother, but passed out in the attempt after desperately texting Zack for help. By the time he came to, everyone was already dead.
He followed Sephiroth and Zack all the way up the mountain to the reactor. By the time he got there, Sephiroth had defeated Zack, killed Tifa's father, nearly killed Tifa, and was in the process of stealing the remains of Jenova - the alien he now believed was his true "mother." Cloud grabbed Zack's enormous sword and took Sephiroth by surprise, stabbing him in the back. Sephiroth survived and was furious. Cloud tried to finish him off but ended up impaled on Sephiroth's sword instead. Somehow, he managed to drag himself further along the blade and then use it to fling Sephiroth into the reactor's core, killing him.
Cloud and Zack were in the process of bleeding out when Hojo, the scientist responsible for the Jenova Project, captured them and took them back to his secret lab.
no subject
Date: 2025-06-13 10:18 pm (UTC)After reading the bit about working with Zack, her one comment is, "He does seem like that kinda guy. Glad I didn't have him pegged wrong."
The rest of it, Fred read without comment. But she can't help but to frown, and by the time she reaches Hojo, there are tears on her face. "Oh no," she practically whispers, and she looks up to Cloud. "I'm so sorry, Cloud. For all of you. I- I'll keep reading, I know there's a bunch more, but this is not something anyone should've had to go through."
no subject
Date: 2025-06-14 07:55 am (UTC)Her comment about Zack marks the closest Cloud has come to smiling all day, even if he's still not quite there. "Mm. Zack's the best." Then his face falls back into pensive anticipation, knowing what's coming next in the file. Zack's the best, and Cloud's the reason he died.
When he sees the tears start to well up in her eyes, that's when he starts thinking maybe he should leave after all. She doesn't strictly need him here to read this, right? He got this kind of reaction once already when he told Aerith the truth of what happened, and he really doesn't want to endure it again. By the time she looks up, his gaze is firmly elsewhere.
"Should's got nothin' to do with it," he mutters. "It happened, it was a long time ago, it's over and done."
But he sticks around for now, at least, as she keeps reading.
The file explains events in such clear and chronological terms that it sounds bizarre to Cloud. His memories of childhood may be vague and distant, but his memories of this portion are nearly incomprehensible - nothing but brief, foggy snippets of pain and confusion and fear drenched in green, bracketing huge gaps of absolutely nothing. And he didn't learn what really happened or why until much, much later.
What Fred reads is that Hojo was testing what he called the Jenova Reunion Theory. Jenova was a mimetic, psychic predator with the ability to absorb the memories and forms of its prey, as well as merge its own genes with other life forms, mutating them to be more like it. Sephiroth was the perfect hybrid Hojo wanted, so he moved on to a different hypothesis: that bits of Jenova's genetic material separated from the source would act to rejoin that source, influencing their hosts' minds and bodies to reunite with the whole. To test this, Hojo used Sephiroth's cells and infusions of mako - the lifeblood of the world, the material element of the Lifestream, which contains the memories and knowledge of every soul to ever have lived on the Planet and then died to return to it - to create so-called 'Sephiroth clones' and spread them out across the world.
Zack already having been a SOLDIER with a First's level of mako infusion made him immune to the experiments, so Hojo declared him a failure. Cloud, on the other hand, was found to be so susceptible to the deleterious effects of mako on the human brain that he suffered severe brain damage from mako poisoning over time and, eventually, fell into an amnesiac and catatonic state that really should have been permanent, medically speaking. Hojo declared him a failure, too.
But after four years of captivity, Zack broke them both out. He found a spare SOLDIER's uniform to replace Cloud's mako-soaked clothes and then escaped, taking the catatonic Cloud with him. For another year, Zack kept Cloud safe and alive as he avoided Shinra's forces, traveling across two continents to get back to Midgar and bringing Cloud along every step of the way, taking care of him and talking to him as if he could respond.
Meanwhile, Sephiroth's body had returned to the Planet as usual when he died, but his mind was so alien to the Lifestream and his will to maintain his memories and identity so powerful that eventually, after five years, his consciousness awoke from inside the Lifestream. Cloud's genetic and psychic connection to him plus his natural tenacity and survival instinct combined to allow him to slowly claw back to consciousness as Sephiroth did; and since the mako had scoured away so many of his memories, drowning them out with its billions of identities and lifetimes of knowledge, that connection took hold strongly.
Cloud gradually became more aware of his surroundings until he could almost respond...just as Shinra caught up to them with an army. And then this happened.
no subject
Date: 2025-06-15 10:30 pm (UTC)So she nods to herself, wipes her face, and takes a deep breath before diving further. She's frowning, but promises herself not to show anything else until they get through it. She can always break down on her own time.
And boy, does it get worse. Her jaw sets as she continues reading about Hojo. She asks about mako and the Lifestream in a little more detail, but for the most part she's interested in plowing through it.
She manages not to cry while reading over Zack's escape and his journey to Midgar, and subsequent death. "He really is the best, isn't he?" she says quietly.
Beginning of the Two-Step Flood, spam
Date: 2025-06-13 10:22 pm (UTC)\o/
Date: 2025-06-14 06:06 am (UTC)This results in the door opening about half a second after Fred knocks on it, and there's Cloud, blinking at her in a bit of surprise - though this feels right, somehow, even though normally he just meets her at the maintenance office.
"Oh - hey." He finds himself relaxing, suddenly. The impulse to hurry simply vanishes. His brow furrows. "...weird. You feel that, too?"
Re: \o/
Date: 2025-06-15 10:14 pm (UTC)But- yeah. She's suddenly feeling like everything's right, now that she's here. Confusion flickers across her face. "Like the 'hurry up and go' has turned into 'everything is fine' all of a sudden?"
no subject
Date: 2025-06-16 07:04 am (UTC)"Guess it's a good thing we're headed to the same place for now."
no subject
Date: 2025-06-18 11:58 pm (UTC)She steps forward towards Cloud again, and that awful feeling is gone. "Oof. Guess it is. I'm still not used to these floods happenin' so often. Never had anything like this before. But when we're close, we're fine, huh?"
She tilts her head to the side and makes space for him in the hallway. They can talk while they walk. She's not entirely worried about this one yet, weird as it is.
no subject
Date: 2025-06-19 05:35 am (UTC)He steps out and locks his door before walking alongside Fred, taking care to keep pace with her even if it's slightly slower than he usually walks.
"Wonder what happens if we get too far apart...nothing good, I'm sure." If this is a warden-inmate thing, then he hopes Sephiroth went to find Yunlan instead of being stubborn and stupid about it. But probably not. Sephiroth also may not be a huge fan of Cloud staying close to Fred until whatever this is ends...well, they'll cross that bridge when they come to it.
"Um...what're we gonna do after our shifts in maintenance are over?"
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Date: 2025-06-19 11:44 pm (UTC)Her hair is falling in front of her face- she didn't have time to braid it today. So she sweeps it back as best she can and fidgets with the ends. "That'll inform how we continue, though. I'd like to give you as much space as I can. But if my guess is correct, we'll probably be sleeping in the same room for a week. Sorry, Cloud."
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Date: 2025-06-20 02:59 am (UTC)He stops, then. "Okay. You stay here, I'll start walking backwards. I'll keep going until you say stop, or until I can't. Ready?"
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Date: 2025-06-27 12:00 am (UTC)The experiment, then! She nods as he explains it, and lets him step back away from her. The distance immediately makes her feel queasy, but she bears with it until he's a little over 20 feet away. "Okay, stop! Stop stop. I don't think it's going to...to max out or whatever." She's leaning against the wall at this point, using it to keep her upright as she walks back towards him. "Think it would just knock us out if we went too much further...urgh..."
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Date: 2025-06-27 06:08 am (UTC)She finally tells him to stop and he does, letting himself stagger against the wall and squeezing his eyes shut with a quiet groan until she's close enough that it lets up some. He lets out a breath of relief and frustration both at once as he starts moving toward her, too.
"Probably, yeah. Not too much room for error, then." When she's almost within reach, he holds out a hand to shorten the distance more quickly and help steady her, if she needs it.
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Date: 2025-06-29 04:28 pm (UTC)She knows he'll probably say he's fine, but Cloud's body has been through a lot. There might be a lingering headache or something.
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Date: 2025-06-30 10:01 pm (UTC)Then there's a pause that's only a little awkward. "Guess we should just...hold on, for now. While it's easy, might as well."
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Date: 2025-07-02 08:09 pm (UTC)"That works for me, if it works for you," she says, squeezing his hand gently. "I'm guessing this is hitting the whole ship, so no one's gonna think the wrong thing about us holding hands." Probably not even Sephiroth, although the jury is out on him. "We're probably doing better than most, considering we work together already. But, um, let me know if you need some space- like, mental space. I promise I don't have to be talkin' all the time."
There have been numerous times in Maintenance when she hasn't said much at all, in fact. She will get extremely focused on one project or another. But being actually tethered together makes this situation feel a little different.
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Date: 2025-07-05 04:43 am (UTC)"Sure," he confirms, squeezing lightly back. "Don't much care what anybody else thinks about it." Except Sephiroth, of course, but that's a given. He'll get in touch telepathically in a bit and head that off at the pass, just in case.
"Good point. Might be the only ones still working today." Which is fine with Cloud.
He glances over at her at the offer, brows slightly raised. "Even if you did, I don't mind." Granted, he would definitely mind if it was a lot of other people. But not Fred.
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Date: 2025-07-06 10:08 pm (UTC)As they're walking to the office, she thinks over what they have waiting for them. "Y'know, I bet we could probably hold down Maintenance ourselves if we had to. There's not as many projects as there have been in the past. Of course, no one's come around messing up the place either, recently. It's practically serene, compared to what I'm used to."